Getting back to the things that used to make me happy, made me realize just how much i missed and need them. Turning off the phone and letting myself truly be alone, theres nothing better than that. If people can't contact you, they cant bring you down and irritate you with their drama!
Of course people will try and bring you down and make you feel bad whenever they get the chance, but not if i dont let them. Tell me to stand up for myself, but when i do, then try to say things to piss me off, aint gunna work people. I will not apologize for being happy, because it offends you..get your own life and let me live mine.
Listening to the rain and wind slam against my window sounding like its going to shatter it any second while music plays and candles are lit is the perfect sunday. Almost makes me forget ive never been this stressed in my life.
Keeping my thoughts and problems to myself is so gratifying. I like having things that are mine, and no one can give me their opinion or judge me. I have missed the days when i had no friends and i would sit in my room thinking and writing and just relaxing, thats definetly something thats coming back.
There is 1 thing in particular that is making my nights sleepless and my days stressful..my psychology experiment paper that i cant start to save my life. Its all i can think about and wish that it was may 25th already. Came into this semester thinking that statistics would be my bane. But actually stats is going pretty good which is shocking to me. The day i get this damn paper done, will be a good day.
Something random but so irritating: when i say im good alone, and NO one seems to hear it. No i dont want to go out with you, no i dont want or need a boyfriend right now. But for some reason my phone is blowing up with texts and people will even more their seat to sit by me, pisses me off. Definetly not trying to sound conceeded, i just hate when what i want cant be respected. Of course i will be nice and talk to you, but thats just being friendly. It does NOT mean anything more.
It comes down to the fact that like everyone else, im trying to find my place and purpose in this world. Its the little things in life that make me smile and forget all the bad. Just have to hold onto those things and cherish the short time that we have on this earth, because it can always be so much worse!
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